Dean's World! Party On!

(With apologies to Dana Carvey and Mike Myer's wonderful skit and the Deans World blog)

Announcer: "And now on CATV 11, we present the Chairman of the Democratic Party, Howard Dean."
Intro: "Dean's World! Dean's World! Party on! Party on!" (Camera zooms in and out wildly)
Dean: "Hi everyone! I'm Howard Dean and with me is the most excellent dude, Ted Kennedy. Party on, Ted!"
Ted: "Party on, Howie!"
Dean: "Cool! OK!" (winks) "Today we're going to talk about those really mean guys, and you know who I mean: The Republicans!"
Ted: "They're so totally uncool it makes me want to hurl!"
Dean: "Hey, Ted, cool it - did you take your meds today? We don't have the bucks for clean-up if you hurl, dude."
Ted: "But what about all those guys runnin' around gettin' bling-bling for us?"
Dean: "You mean the fundraisers? Gone, dude. Most heinous..not to say totally bogus!"
Ted: "No way!"
Dean: "Way!."
Dean: "But that's not why we're here...we're hear to talk with our man Bill Richardson, governor of New Mexico, and a really cool dude. Did you know he's Hispanic?"
Ted: "Really. Woww. Like, where'd he get the name Richardson, then?"
Dean: "Dunno. Maybe an evil Republican snuck into the hospital when he was a little baby and switched name caards around or somethin'."
Ted: "Bogus! Yeah, that's just the sorta thing those bastards would do (hic)."
Dean: "Yeah....so, anyway, come on in Bill!"
Dean and Ted: "Dean's World! Party on!" (in chorus)
Bill: "Hi, fellows!"
Dean and Ted: "You're not worthy! You're not worthy!" (in chorus)
Bill: "Don't you mean, 'we're not worthy'?"
Dean: "No dude, we're worthy, OK? But we heard you're not like on the ticket and saying you don't go along with what we're telling the folks. Uncool, bud."
Bill: "Well I'd hope you'd understand that I serve all people of the state of New Mexico and, as such, I don't think it's fair to characterize all Republicans as 'white, Christians who've never worked a day in their lives'."
Dean: "But it's true, Bill-o-mine! And it's my Party so I can say it, dude, and you guys are supposed to live it and keep in line!"
Ted: "Most excellent, Howie!" (high fives Dean)
Dean: "Party on, Ted!"
Bill: "But many of my friends and colleagues are Republicans and I wouldn't characterize them all as rich white Christians. We can't keep demonizing them, we have to have a positive message that appeals to the voters."
Dean: "Ummm...Bill? Did you ever run for President?"
Bill: "No I haven't"
Dean: "Well I did and everytime I asked folks to challenge the Man, dude, they yelled and roared. So, like, I must be right!"
Bill: "Howard, those crowds were your most fervent followers. Of course they did! But that doesn't reflect America."
Dean: "Yeah, like you'll know what works for the Party ... when monkeys fly outta my butt!" (high fives Ted)
Ted: "Maybe Bills like, umm, a spy or something, Howie! Oh, man, I feel dizzy"
Dean: "Maybe, Ted. And you're dizzy 'cause of what was in that empty bottle of Scotch!"
Bill: "Fellows, I'm no traitor to the Party! I just think we're on the wrong message!"
Dean: "Yeah (snicker), right. "
Dean: "We're out of time tonight, but next week we'll yell at Joe Biden who's also saying most heinous things about our speeches. And then we'll speak with that very cool lady, Nancy Pelosi. She doesn't give us any crap."
Ted: "No sir, Howie!"
Dean: "We'll see you later...remember, 'GOP Not for Me!' 'GOP Not for Me!'"
Ted: "Party on, dude!"
Dean: "Party on, Ted! "
Dean and Ted: "Dean's World! Party on!" (in chorus)
Announcer: "This has been a production of CATV 11. Stay tuned for 'We're better, we're smarter, and gosh-darn it people like us!' featuring Al Franken.